Dear “Sir” Paul McCartney…
November 2, 2007 | 9:56 am | by Chris Akin |Rate It:
In case you can’t figure it out, this Heather Mills/Paul McCartney bugs me. It really, REALLY bugs me that this horrific stumpcunt is going to end up living like royalty when all the dust settles. This greedy pig wants it all though, and is now threatening to play dirty with Sir Paul because he won’t just give her everything she wants. First, she whined about receiving death threats and how Paul isn’t doing enough to protect her while she tries to proverbially fuck Paul in his all leather wallet. Now, since Paul hasn’t given her what she wants, she’s threatening to release the private recordings the couple made of their divorce counselling sessions. It’s calculated, cold, and the ONLY purpose this can serve is to try to humiliate Paul enough to force him to give her everything she wants to make the situation go away.
It’s at this point that I, as a representative of all of the fans of Sir Paul McCartney, wish to issue an open letter to him letting him know exactly how we feel.
Dear “Sir” Paul,
Regarding your recent situation with your vicious ex-wife Heather Mills, we the fans of your professional work as well as human beings that find her efforts to blackmail you, beg you to not only give in to her demands, but fight her tooth and nail and leave her NOTHING. Please Paul, fight it. If you lose in court, appeal it. If you lose then, take it to a higher court and appeal it again. In other words, stretch things out as long as you can.
Ms. Mills has recently said she’s going to blackmail you by releasing your personal admittances to wrongdoing within your marriage that has caused your divorce to happen. I submit to you, as a loyal fan, that we do not care what you did. No matter what you have done, regardless of how heinous Ms. Mills feels it was, does NOT entitle her to the money we have given you for the enjoyment that you’ve given us. In fact, below is a list of things we would forgive you for:
1. Having sex with farm animals. Let’s face it, we know you are very down on any use or abuse of animals, but knowing how you write, I’m sure you were loving if you endulged in this practice. After seeing what a miserable cunt you were married to, we can understand why you would turn to an animal that won’t talk back.
2. Having a fetish for stump scars. There has to be something to this, Paul. You are so rich that you could have any woman on the planet, if not 5-10 at a time. You easily could make Hugh Hefner look embarrassing by contrast with all your bank. But you chose a one legged whore who plotted to steal your money. We don’t care if Ms. Mills produces video footage of you running your tongue up and down her stump stitchline, and we’d understand. We’ll accept that as kinky, and move on.
3. You beat her repeatedly. It’s not cool to hit a woman, but if you did beat her, you didn’t do it hard enough considering this pig’s current actions. Even if you beat her with her own fake leg, she’s still alive and unscarred to the naked eye, so you didn’t get your $100,000,000 worth.
Paul, as a representative of your fans, I beg of you to not give her anything. Further, it is my strongest hope that you stop being the “bigger man” and play just as dirty as she is. Maybe some photos of this one legged twat bouncing around the yard like she’s on a pogo stick would be interesting for the public to see. If she can parade into court in a wheelchair only a week after being a contestant on DANCING WITH THE STARS, then you can show this handicapped whore for the truly physically lacking pig that she is.
Sadly Paul, you’ve taken the words of your ex-bandmate John Lennon, and it’s backfired on you. You gave peace a chance, and now you are being screwed for it. I suggest you move to the words of another legendary band called AC/DC and proclaim, “This…Means…WAR!”. Please fight to win. Your troops are here to support you.
Women are only women when they have two legs and are genuine.
Thank you,
Chris Akin
Concerned Beatle Fan
Hey Chris, maybe you should take up your long buried “Mommy” issues up with the tramp who unfortuately gave you life.
Seems like you are a thick-headed, angry misogynist who needs to learn some facts about this issue.
One thing Heather has on “Sir” Paul. Bet she has received oral sex from UNDERAGE groupies.
Hmmm, let’s see another, hasn’t been a hard-core drug addict for most of her life. Unlike his daughter Stella, ACTUALLY made a life for herself without Daddy’s money or name.
Maybe you are just an angry,vindictive little prick who needs to grow up, Chris. Only cunt around is the dirty one who pushed you into the world. Ugh.
“Only cunt around is the dirty one who pushed you into the world. Ugh.”
Not sure she’s the only one, but she definitely is a dirty cunt that I’d love to hear died. I really do hate that bitch!
“One thing Heather has on “Sir” Paul. Bet she has received oral sex from UNDERAGE groupies. Hmmm, let’s see another, hasn’t been a hard-core drug addict for most of her life.”
I’m sure you meant to say that she “HASN’T”, but that’s OK. Nowhere in this did I say that Paul was Johnny Christian Right. He’s a rockstar, and that being said, rock star insanity goes on. I don’t endorse it, much like I don’t endorse his heroin use or ridiculous religious moments of the late 60s.
“Unlike his daughter Stella, ACTUALLY made a life for herself without Daddy’s money or name.”
Agreed, unlike Stella (a person who’s name has not appeared in any of my articles on this subject, as she too is a gold digging cunt), ol’ Right Foot made her way by blowing Saudi Princes as a high end call girl. Somehow though, a whore with excessively rich clientele is still a whore. Clearly Heather has mastered the art of whoring for the rich.
“Seems like you are a thick-headed, angry misogynist who needs to learn some facts about this issue.”
All the facts I need to know on this issue are right here…There is NOTHING this stumpy slut did that was worth 40+ million dollars a year. Absolutely nothing. For all the tryuing to argue that I’m this or that, you provide NOTHING that proves that she did anything to earn $40 million a year. If he cheated with farm animals, licked her stump while humming “I Saw Her (Almost) Standing There”, or ravaged her repeatedly, it’s not worth $40 million a year. Maybe instead of me learning the facts, it is you that needs to bring objectivity to a scenario which is obscenely ridiculous. At most, Pogo is due around $10 million dollars…around the same money she would have made in the 4 years as a high priced callstump.
“Hey Chris, maybe you should take up your long buried “Mommy” issues up with the tramp who unfortuately gave you life.”
There’s nothing buried. I hate her. She hates me. She’s not a gold digger, just a cunt. I’m sure you can relate.
Have a nice day.